Alton Brown's Turkey Tactics

*sigh* Oh how I love Alton Brown.  If you haven't watched his ultra awesome show Good Eats, go now, I'll wait.

That being said, last night Food Network re-aired for the billionth time "Romancing the Bird," Alton's Thanksgiving episode.  I now present to you Alton's turkey advice, and T-Day Turkey Tactics.  Now, there are two videos from this episode available on foodtv.com.  I could make you go search for those videos, but that wouldn't be very blog-neighborly of me now would it.  Check 'em out.)

Let us continue.

Word to the wise and wisdom seekers, you're going to want to start this either Thanksgiving eve or early Thanksgiving morning.  The choice is yours (isn't that nice?)

Let's make a brine!

In a stock pot combine the following.

• 1 gallon vegetable stock
• 1 cup kosher salt
• 1/2 cup light brown sugar
• 1 tbsp black peppercorns
• 1/2 tbsp allspice berries
• 1/2 tbsp candied ginger

If you have trouble finding, or object to the cost of the allspice berries or the candied ginger, leave them out, the brine is excellent with or without them.

Boil this beautiful brine.  Stir to dissolve everything and remove from heat.  Let it cool to room temperature and then throw it into the fridge until thoroughly chilled.  

Remove your turkey from it's packaging, and get the guts and glory out of the cavity.  Rinse your bird inside and out.  

At this point I should note that most turkeys come with some sort of doohickey to hold the legs together.  Whatever it is made of, leave it on there, yes even plastic as the companies that sell turkeys are smart enough to make sure that the plastic is oven safe.

Once that's done, pour the brine and 1 gallon of heavily iced water into a clean (CLEAN!) 5 gallon bucket.  Lower your turkey, breast down into the brine.  Cover and set in a cool area, either your basement, garage, patio, whatever, for 6 hours.  Halfway through brining, turn the turkey over.  After the six hours are up, remove the turkey, dump the brine, rinse the turkey and pat it dry.

Turkey quiz time!  At what temperature is dark meat considered cooked?  Answer . . . 180° F.  And at what temperature is white meat considered cooked?  Answer . . . 161° F.  For those of you that are stumped at how to roast a turkey to two different temperatures, fear not and read on.

Use a large piece of tinfoil and fold it into a triangle.  Rub it with canola (or any other neutral) oil and form it to the turkey breast.  Remove it and set it aside, keeping the shape.  Now, rub your turkey thoroughly with canola oil (promotes browning).  Leave in your turkey timer if there is one, it's useless, but if you remove it, juices will drain out of the hole leaving your turkey dry.  Also, tuck the wings under the turkey, if you don't, they'll flap around and burn, and that won't impress your mother-in-law.

Ok, we're almost done!  Let's fill the cavity with...I'm sorry, what?  Stuffing?  No, no no.  You don't stuff a turkey, or any bird for that matter.  *sigh*  Ok, fine I'll explain it.

Stuffing adds mass to your turkey which increases the cooking time.  It is a breeding ground for bacteria like salmonella and it dries out your meat. So don't stuff your bird!  If you want to make stuffing, that's fine, but it is a side dish, not an inside dish.

Let's continue.  Take a chunk (or two) of rosemary, and a stalk of sage and stuff them in the turkey cavity.  Cut an onion in half, and slice and apple, put them in a microwave safe dish and add a little bit of water.  Microwave for 5 minutes.  Toss a whole cinnamon stick and let it steep for about 8 minutes.  Using a set of tongs, place the onion and the apple slices inside your turkey's cavity.  There.  Don't worry about your meat tasting too sweet, it won't happen, just trust me.  Now, take a probe thermometer and insert it into the thickest part of the white meat, avoiding the keel and rib bones.  

Preheat your oven to 500°.  Get your turkey on a wire rack and into a roasting pan.  When your oven is ready, toss your turkey in, legs first, and set the timer for 30 minutes.  Once that 30 minutes is up, use the turkey triangle we made earlier and place it on the breast, lower the temp. to 350° and set your probe thermometer alarm to 161°.  14-16 lb turkey should need 2 - 2.5 hours roasting time.  

Once your turkey reaches that magic number, remove it from the oven and let it rest for 15 minutes.  Cover the turkey loosely with foil, a large stainless steel bowl or a grill cover before carving.